Are you caring for children or youth in your home, or adult relatives or friends, or both? Are you feeling overwhelmed, tired or worried much of the time? Are you sleeping too much or too little? Do you become easily irritated or angry? Have you lost interest in activities that you used to enjoy? If you answered “yes,” you may be experiencing caregiver stress.

Life is full of stress. Caregivers experience varying degrees of stress because of the changes and demands in their lives due to the caring role. Try though you might you cannot avoid or eliminate stress. Identifying that you are in the throes of stress is only the first, tip of the iceberg, step. The important trick is to manage the stress that comes your way. That inevitably begins at a place that many caregivers ignore: themselves.

Self-care is critical. Left to snowball – and, if unmanaged, it will – stress can cause a range of problems in you that will eventually compromise your ability to be a caregiver as well as diminishing your own quality of life. It is not wrong to tend to your needs. In fact it is necessary.

What can you do, though? There is no magic bullet nor one-size-fits-all solution to coping with stress. Some suggestions to take care of you, though, include:
1. Pray and read the scripture daily. Some scripture passages that might be especially helpful are Matthew 11:28-30, Matthew 6:25-27, and Philippians 4:6.
2. Ask for help. It is OK to stop trying to do it all alone and to identify some people who can help you and ease the burden a bit.
3. Give yourself a break. Do something for fun and relaxation. What gives you pleasure? Art? Reading? Music? Lunch with friends? Taking a nap? Visiting a museum? Whatever fun things are on your list: carve out some time and do them.
4. Keep a sense of humor. Don’t take yourself or your situation too seriously. What you are doing as a caregiver is serious; but allow yourself to see the humor in everyday situations. Don’t hesitate to laugh.
5. Take care of your health. Don’t neglect your own physical needs, including the need for exercise.
6. Join a support group. Support groups abound for a wide variety of caregiving needs. A simple search in your favorite search engine will help you to discover them. Our own congregation here at Westminster offers a monthly support group for caregivers of those with Alzheimer’s Disease and related dementias. The group meets on the 4th Thursday of the month from noon until 1:00 p.m. in Memorial Parlor.

Caregiving is not an easy road. Truly, only those who are or who have been caregivers know what the journey is like. As you continue on the caregiving path, please discover ways to take care of yourself with the same love that you give to the recipients of your care. And remember that, as people of faith, we can boldly believe that we are never alone. We have the richest source of comfort and peace that we can imagine in our loving God. Whatever your caregiving days may bring, remember Jesus’ gentle words and find in them comfort for the journey: "Come to me, all you that are weary and are carrying heavy burdens, and I will give you rest.” (Matthew 11:28, NRSV)

Suggested resources:
• http://www.aarp.org/home-family/caregiving/info-2014/ways-for-caregivers-to-nurture-themselves.html
• http://www.helpguide.org/articles/stress/caregiving-stress-and-burnout.htm
• http://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/stress-management/in-depth/caregiver-stress/art-20044784
• http://www.helpguide.org/articles/stress/preventing-burnout.htm
• http://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/stress-management/in-depth/stress-symptoms/art-20050987?pg=1

 Shalom,

Dave